A new "star blogger"?
This past weekend, a very interesting exchange took place on our site between an anonymous blogger and "Jessica" who appears to be our newest star blogger. Thank you, Jessica, and welcome to our site! The following is their exchange:
Anon asked: "Within a marriage a couple must be open to life when consumating an intimate act. I understand that. However, in order for that to happen only the husband needs to have any kind of 'response'. For many women to have that same 'response' what you have described as sinful contact must occur. It seems a little one sided here! Does the church just not like women?"
Jessica answered: "Prior to his becoming pope, JPII wrote the book Love and Responsibility. In this book, he wrote of just the situation commented on by the above person on p.270-8, particularly p.272. Here's a (really) quick summary of what it says: In the marital act--for it to be a true expression of love, as God created it to be: 'it is necessary to insist that intercourse must not serve merely as a means of allowing sexual excitement to reach its climax in one of the partners, ie. the man alone, but that climax must be reached in harmony, not at the expense of one partner, but with both partners fully involved.' (yes, that's the pope writing:)
He goes on to say that the reality that it takes longer for a woman to become aroused means that a man should deny himself immediate sexual gratification and work to see that he and his wife reach climax 'as far as possible...simultaneously.' The man's desire should stem not from a hedonistic desire, but out of a desire to love and serve his wife in the marital bed. By acting in such a way, a man grows in the virtue of loving his wife like Christ loves the Church (see Ephesians 5).
I encourage this person to read Love & Responsibility and if this is daunting get books by Christopher West who helps explain the Church's teaching on marriage and sexuality. I assure you it is a beautiful teaching which fully appreciates women for who they were created to be; That is--we were created to be loved as persons and not used as objects for male gratification. Happy Reading--may it bring you closer to our Lord and his Church."
Anon responded: "You are really wonderful to respond with this- I will read. I hoped there would be some teaching about this somewhere- just didn't know where."